In 2000, I read The Ecology of Commerce by Paul Hawken, and it blew me away. This book was the first exposure I had to the idea of redesigning human society and industry in nature’s image, where the concept of waste doesn’t exist and human potential is as important a raw material as anything that comes out of the Earth.ﾠ

For several years, I held these ideas in my heart, but I didn’t do much with them. 

Life as I was living it then didn’t have room for all these new concepts I was itching to try out—besides having a job, I also was in a band, ran a small business, and had an incredibly full social calendar.ﾠ

I made a few attempts to change the way I lived, but none of them really stuck. I just kept doing what I was doing, and I was happy enough, but there was always a bit of cognitive dissonance in my head. Why am I not making the contribution I dream of making? I’d think, then spend entire days reading websites by people who were making those kinds of contributions and jump back on my treadmill.ﾠ

A lot of us are in this boat, aren’t we? We run around doing what we always do; in the evening we crash exhausted in front of the television or the computer screen; and sometimes, we feel trapped and full of despair over not having the lives we wish we had. But we’re not sure how to break out of this pattern, so instead we stay in it, year after year, wondering where the time went.ﾠ

It’s a sad story, and an all-too-familiar one. But it’s not inevitable. We can break out of the cage. It just takes a little effort to create some empty space in our lives so that we can act out of choice rather than habit.ﾠ

I’m not talking about selling everything you own and moving to the middle of nowhere (though, please feel free to do so if you wish!). What I’m talking about is creating a little room into your life, so that instead of bouncing willy-nilly from one event/happening/problem to another, you have a moment to breathe and be and make conscious choices on what you’re going to do with your precious hours.ﾠ

An example: I’d often say things like “Yeah, I would love to do that, but I just don’t have the time.” Then I’d come home from work and watch 6 hours of television. And I’m not the only one who does this. Obviously, time isn’t the issue.ﾠ

What is? I think a lot of it comes from how we see ourselves fitting into the world: our context. Many of our day-to-day activities and behaviors stem from the contexts we find ourselves in—physical, social, and psychological. Change your context and your life changes, too. I’ve experienced this first hand over the last few years ...ﾠ

When I moved to New York from Pittsburgh in 2005, it was easier to make some changes, because I found myself in a new physical context. First off, I was able to ditch my car, which was fabulous. In my old hometown, the bus system was dicey, but New York has the best public transportation ever. One cognitive dissonance resolved.ﾠ

My changed social context also allowed me to make other changes to the way I set up my life. Of course, our choices are always our own responsibility, but sometimes the people we love have a lot invested in who they think we are, which can make it difficult to be something different—we have to overcome not only our own inertia, but also the inertia and sometimes the disapproval of our friends and families. On my own in a new city that embodies transformation, I could be as radical as I wanted.ﾠ

But ... the theme of my life was still unclear. I knew what was important to me, but I lacked the—what?—willpower? tenacity? focus?—to stick with it and really commit. I spun my wheels in dead-end romances and partied too much. The larger context and purpose of my life was still eluding me.ﾠ

Last year, when I encountered what was to become my spiritual path, it lit me up like a lightning bolt, exploding my psychological context to an unprecedented degree. Instead of seeing my problems and desires as the center of the universe, I started to see myself in the context of 14 billion years of evolution. Instead of coming home and wallowing in a carton of Ben & Jerry’s at the end of a hard day, I began to look honestly at my own participation in creating that bad day. I decided to grow up and declare my allegiance to life itself.ﾠ

I came to understand that my life is not just about me, or, really about me at all. It’s about this process, this grand experiment in matter and consciousness we know as the living universe. Seeing myself in this larger context makes it a lot easier to keep going when small little obsessed-with-myself me would rather give up.ﾠ

Of course, even with all this context-shifting, I have a long way to go—I’m not functioning at anywhere near the level I want to be—but I have seen progress. And we all can see progress in ourselves and in the world, if we find a big enough reason to try.ﾠ

Also: Please know that I’m not saying everyone should jump into the same spiritual teachings that I have—just that if we want to make changes, if we want to make the leap from self-involved to future-creating beings, we need to see ourselves as part of something larger, in a greatly expanded context. Whatever gives you that universe’s-eye view—whether spiritual or secular—grab it and let it work on and in and through you!ﾠ

As I said, I’ve got a long way to go. Right now I’m working with my habits around food. I’m also in a new relationship that is incredibly sweet but is also requiring me to look at how I am in relationships, and that is not always easy. I’m also longing to integrate my life—to feel like all my efforts are pushing towards the same goal—rather than compartmentalizing my days into buckets of work, fun, and personal projects.ﾠ

And, of course, The Sunny Way—leading this project is pointing to even more limiting ideas and behaviors, more avenues for growth and exploration. The more I do, the more I realize I have yet to do. Solve one set of problems and another set appears, usually more advanced problems than those you just resolved. It’s a messy process, but also joyful. There are those moments along the way where a sticky problem finally gets unlodged, and relief fills my chest—when I know I have found a new, better context, one that feels, and actually is, healthy and good.ﾠ

In pushing the boundaries of what we and our friends and families think is do-able, in challenging our ideas about who we are and where we are in the universe, and in choosing to live according to the highest knowledge we have attained, we actually create a new context that supports the world that we want—where making healthy choices is far easier than making destructive ones.ﾠ

And the more deeply we lean into this new world, the more we love and nurture and believe in it, the more real it becomes for everyone.

(photo by Tres via flickr)